Skip to main content

Grace Lessons and My Word for 2024

Each December, for many years, the Lord gave me a “word” for the new year. The last couple of years, I sought words, but they never came.

This year, I hadn’t been seeking, but last week, one word kept appearing (and is still appearing) to me in so many different ways, even though I hadn’t mentioned it to anyone. And already, He is using the word to teach me, guide me, challenge me to become more like Him.

The word is GRACE.

Before I had my boys, I knew if I ever had a little girl, I would name her Grace. My grandmother’s best friend was a beautiful woman named Grace, whose face – and life – shone Jesus every moment I knew her. When I was a teen, I said to my grandmother that Grace must have had a pretty special life to be so lovely and loving, but she said that Grace’s life had actually been quite difficult, painful, and harsh. Years later, I finally understood it was those trials she encountered and conquered that drew her closer to the Lord. Just thinking of her today brings tears to my eyes – may we all be like Grace.

As I began pondering GRACE as my word for 2024, on Thursday, we took a short daytrip for our annual lunch with family members. After hello hugs, we went into a restaurant, ordered food, and while we waited, one of them mentioned having a sore throat, but said, “It’s nothing. And even if it’s something, tomorrow’s another day.”

With Tim’s age, I’ve been cautious all through the pandemic, and then with my cancer journey this year, the caution continued. We had already cancelled/postponed holiday visits with other family members because a loved one has covid. 

But no one had mentioned any illnesses with this family, so we didn’t KNOW we should have cancelled too. When she mentioned her throat, we just thought she meant her sore throat was allergies, and we continued our meal. 

But the literal minute we walked through our front door, she sent a text that said, “When we got home, I decided to get my throat checked and I tested positive for covid. Sorry.”

I’m grateful now that she notified me by text because that gave me time to explode verbally to Tim and not to her. I was so angry. Tim was so angry. She’d had the sore throat for a couple of days and still kept our lunch date, when it could have easily been rescheduled. Not only did she expose us, but she exposed everyone at the restaurant, and at the store where she stopped on the way. We had managed to avoid direct exposure for four years, and her carelessness ended that.

Of course, as soon as we got her text, we showered (which was already the plan anyway just because we had been out and about), washed all our clothes, sprayed with Lysol, etc. And as I write this – Saturday – neither of us have symptoms and pray we won’t get sick. 

Yet through all of that, the anger still lingered.

I spent about 24 hours seething, ranting, and raving at every opportunity about her lack of sense, lack of respect, etc. We’re quarantining ourselves for a couple of weeks, so that we don’t expose anyone if we happen to be contagious and we’ve had to let go of any expectations of gatherings with other family members and friends in the coming weeks.

Each night, we read a chapter or two in the Bible, and right now, we’re following an Advent plan that had us reading Matthew 5 last night. When I got to verses 21-30, the Lord convicted me. I needed to forgive her, period. I needed to forgive her, even if … period. I needed to forgive her. GRACE. Show GRACE to her. Just like God did and does for us. 

As I thought about all of that, I found something curious. Years ago, someone hurt me deeply. I sought counsel with our pastor, and he asked if I thought it would ever be possible to forgive that person. Without one millisecond of hesitation, I said, “Of course. What right do I have not to forgive someone when God gave Jesus so that I can be forgiven?” And I forgave that person instantly.

Fast forward to this event, and I found offering forgiveness was harder, and I don’t know why. So I’ve asked Him to help me. Help me to forgive. Help me to love. Help me to show GRACE. Help me to see her through His eyes and His heart, not my own. 

And He has. I have forgiven her and have released the anger. The weight lifted from me was instant, and now I can go back to enjoying the holidays, rather than wallowing in the negativity.

The more I thought about it, the more I could easily ask and answer, “What right do I have not to forgive someone, when God has forgiven me time and again?” And as I reflect on this past year, which has been so incredibly amazing because of God's mighty presence and His extravagant grace - His gifts - in my life, why would I WANT to hold onto the anger? Let it go and get back living a life filled with the joy I’ve experienced all year long. (My last post, Hitting a Milestone, shares my journey this year.)

I asked Tim to forgive me for all the ranting and raving and He has. I asked God to forgive me for my entire reaction, and because He is faithful, He has.

2024 promises to be an interesting year. Hopefully, I’ll learn His GRACE lessons early. He already has at least one book planned for me to read, by one of my favorite authors: Graceful Influence by Lori Roeleveld releases in March! (You can pre-order now.)








Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Photo Shoot for a Cause

Last month, Advent Health honored me by asking if I would be one of their "faces" during their "Pink Porch" campaign for Breast Awareness Month. They arranged for a photo shoot and an interview, and said I could invite anyone I wanted to be in the photos with me.  Without hesitation, I suggested Jess Bolton, my daughter-in-law, and Felicia Trawick, my nurse navigator-turned-friend. These two were with me every day of my cancer journey, either in person or by phone. God knew what I needed during that time because Jess and Felicia kept me laughing, and we're still at it, as you can tell from the photos below. The lovely and patient photographer, Emily Long, had us talk to each other, and to look at each other, and we just got silly. (Please note: these photos are the only time you'll see me NOT talking with my hands! Such a surprise to all of us!) It was a windy but fun day, and Zach, my son and Jess's husband, surprised and blessed me by coming, too.  Dur...

Our Home Health Care Experience

Blogging got away from me this summer. At the end of July, I got sick with what the doc eventually said was either the flu or covid, but it was too late to test by that time. Then Tim got sick and ended up in the hospital for a week with covid and double pneumonia. He’s home now and recovering well - I’m grateful and he’s happy to be home again. I decided to share our experience with home health care. Since all of this was new to us, I don’t know if our experience is the norm, but thought I’d share in case it’s all new to someone else. The hospital filled up while Tim was there, so once they got him on his feet without oxygen, they sent us home because they needed the bed. But they ordered Home Health Care, saying he needed physical therapy, and that’s what we expected. Tim left the hospital on the 19th. To simply things, I’ll list the dates and duties of Home Health below (we also had 3 doc appts scattered in the middle of all these dates, and perhaps only introverts and hermits like ...

Guest Post: No Time to Sit and Worry by V. Ronnie Laughlin

Earlier this year, TMP Books put out a call for submissions for two anthologies, requesting stories from cancer warriors/survivors, and from cancer caregivers. We received several submissions, but not enough to fill either book, so for now, the books are postponed. When I notified the writers who had submitted, one of them suggested running the stories on my blog, and I loved the idea. My goal was to share people’s stories, to give encouragement and hope to other cancer warriors and caregivers, so why wait? I’m sharing the stories each Tuesday, in the order they were submitted. Today, I welcome author V. Ronnie Laughlin who shares her atypical breast cancer journey from the Middle East, during the pandemic. No Time to Sit and Worry As I held the specimen cup in my hand with the breast biopsy sample glistening inside; I looked at it and it looked at me. It looked like a hydra, the long tentacled invertebrate with a gelatinous body. I do not know what possessed me to ask my Radiologist,...